10 July 2011
$Billion Outdoor Pastime Struggles With Liquid
- FORMULA 1 bosses have been urged to make their multi-million pound cars slightly more adaptable than a 10-year-old Nissan Micra.
As Jenson Button pointed the remains of his car over the finish line before anybody else in the Canadian Grand Prix, many viewers wondered how several billion pounds worth of design had struggled so much to cope with the average road conditions of Manchester in July.
Ferrari boss Stefano Domenicali said: "While I realise that our racing cars might not have a decent cup holder due to weight considerations, I would hope that after spending the GDP of Burkina Fasso they might be able to turn the odd corner when there's enough water on the road to drown a millipede without hurtling themselves over a crash barrier or just bursting into flames.
"In fact, by now I'd really expect them to generate their own
microclimate which not only dried the track around them but also
encouraged the driver to change into his shorts by the time he's
finished the race."
Footage from yesterday's race is already
being pored over by Hollywood producers who believe it could be
invaluable in their upcoming reboot of Harold Lloyd and the Keystone
Cops Go Ice Skating.
F1ologist Wayne Hayes said: "It's difficult
to hear over the sound of the engines and Lewis Hamilton voicing his
opinion of Button, but in the background you can actually hear the cars
generating the noise of swanee whistles and trombones.
eyes were on Button's dramatic
not-suddenly-forgetting-how-to-drive-like-Vettel-did, at the back of the
race you can clearly see the last car crossing the finishing line with
37 old-fashioned policemen clinging to the sides of it."
To get further information on this event goto btween3d.co.uk/
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01 November 2013
Membership Subscriptions & Club Usage
- With general shifts and trends in mind alongside listening closely to your needs we have decided to review our terms of membership and would like to notify you of a few significant changes that will hopefully meet the priorities of existing and new members.
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29 October 2013
Academy Hotel Offers Special Rates
- The Academy is an elegant 4* boutique hotel only 2 minutes from One Alfred Place. The Academy is a stylish solution for you and your guests who may require centrally located accommodation and we are pleased to be able to offer our members specially discounted rates ......
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07 March 2014
A Letter To Sir Richard Branson - Stop Supporting SeaWorld!
- Richard Branson, shame on ye. The self-made ker-squillionaire and ex-hippy flower child has been acting like a hypocrite selling tickets to SeaWorld through his business Virgin Holidays-and he says he's a fan of the orcas and the animals of the underwater kingdom.
Yet he's happy to make a profit from people gawking at these poor creatures in captivity whose lives are no doubt miserable.
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